{"id":225586,"date":"2024-05-29T22:50:14","date_gmt":"2024-05-29T22:50:14","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/michigandigitalnews.com\/index.php\/2024\/05\/29\/virgins-caliche-hymen-broken-by-elons-girthy-drill\/"},"modified":"2025-06-25T17:18:29","modified_gmt":"2025-06-25T17:18:29","slug":"virgins-caliche-hymen-broken-by-elons-girthy-drill","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/michigandigitalnews.com\/index.php\/2024\/05\/29\/virgins-caliche-hymen-broken-by-elons-girthy-drill\/","title":{"rendered":"Virgin’s Caliche Hymen Broken by Elon’s Girthy Drill"},"content":{"rendered":"

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\n \"Scott <\/a>\n <\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n<\/p><\/div>\n

Elon Musk\u2019s underground transportation system, the Vegas Loop, surfaced (technically, \u201cporpoised\u201d) near Virgin Las Vegas on May 24, 2024.<\/p>\n

The Vegas Loop has transported more than two million riders, according to Musk\u2019s Boring Company. Most of those riders wore lanyards. We love lanyards.<\/p>\n

While there\u2019s a tunnel to Virgin, that doesn\u2019t mean you\u2019ll be able to take the Vegas Loop to Virgin anytime soon. Let\u2019s dig into it.<\/p>\n

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Not Elon Musk. Not a Boring Company drill. Not real sand. Yes, sand has lawyers now.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

So, the Vegas Loop currently runs to various stops (the south, central and west halls) within the Las Vegas Convention Center, as well as to Resorts World<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Tunnels have already been drilled to Encore and Westgate as well. Here\u2019s a link to our story<\/a>, \u201cVegas Loop Experiences Multiple Borgasms at Westgate and Encore,\u201d in case you thought the headline of the story you\u2019re reading is our dumbest, ever.<\/p>\n

Like we said, while tunnels exist to various places, you can\u2019t get there from here. That\u2019s because the stations haven\u2019t been built yet. Boring is paying for the tunnels, casinos pay for their own stations.<\/p>\n

We asked Virgin how long it might be before people can actually get to the casino via the Vegas Loop, and the response was \u201chopefully within a year.\u201d So, lower your expectations. The Vegas Loop is more of a long time horizon type deal.<\/p>\n

That shouldn\u2019t take away from the excitement of seeing the Boring drill emerge from the Las Vegas underworld, however.<\/p>\n

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Prufrock subtly emerging beneath @VirginHotelsLV<\/a> <\/p>\n

Thanks for being a great partner \u2013 excited to open your Vegas Loop station! pic.twitter.com\/adpWBByPqr<\/a><\/p>\n

\u2014 The Boring Company (@boringcompany) May 24, 2024<\/a><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

The entire Vegas Loop project has been awash in questions, and the decision to drill to Virgin raises more.<\/p>\n

Our theory is Boring Company meant to drill to the airport, a place people at the Convention Center actually want to go, but got distracted wondering how the hell long it\u2019s going to be before we do another podcast episode. Fair.<\/p>\n

A big criticism of the Las Vegas Monorail, which will be dismantled in the years to come, is it didn\u2019t go to the airport. The taxi lobby saw to that.<\/p>\n

A Vegas Loop stop at the airport makes a lot of sense, so naturally, that\u2019s not what\u2019s happening.<\/p>\n

Why Virgin? Who the hell knows? Boring Company plays its cards close to the vest. Boring Company does virtually no interviews and P.R. They just do their thing, quietly cutting through our famed, rock-hard caliche like butter. Caliche is the main reason Las Vegas homes don\u2019t have basements, although the number of online trolls would give the impression otherwise.<\/p>\n

Actually, Virgin isn\u2019t the final destination of this leg of the Vegas Loop, it\u2019s a stop along the way to UNLV\u2019s Thomas & Mack Center.<\/p>\n

Boring\u2019s Prufrock machine, reminiscent of the sandworms of Arrakis, can drill more than a mile in a week. If you got that reference, don\u2019t worry, what you\u2019re missing by never having sex is more than made up for by winning trivia contests at your neighborhood bar.<\/p>\n

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A piece of the Boring drill is on display at the Convention Center. Dibs on the band name Cutterhead.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Generally, we\u2019re a fan of the Vegas Loop, despite all the criticism<\/a> from folks who don\u2019t really get Las Vegas.<\/p>\n

Critics think the whole Vegas Loop idea is a boondoggle. They\u2019re wrong, of course. It\u2019s fun and Elon Musk is paying for the thing. Frankly, they had us at \u201ctaxpayers aren\u2019t footing the bill for this.\u201d Yes, there are some tax dollars involved, however. The first tunnels were paid for by the LVCVA, which operates the Las Vegas Convention Center, and the LVCVA gets its money from a room tax. Boring Co. will presumably recoup its investment from ticket revenue and about $160,000 a month (taxpayer dollars) to manage the system.<\/p>\n

But still, Elon Musk is fronting the money for pretty much the whole underground rideshare system and Las Vegas gets some ongoing P.R. and the only thing that could make the Vegas Loop better is if they gave every rider a lanyard.<\/p>\n

Look, it\u2019s a hoot.<\/p>\n

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